Monday, January 14, 2008

Defining my focus

Sacred Geometry and Sacred Numerology is involved in what I'm working on now as a series. Basically. It's a bit more complicated than just saying it flippantly though. My biggest problem last year was defining what direction I wanted to go in. I got stuck in a loop of my making.

Some pieces will be on kangaroo vellum. Some on modern paper vellum from Spicers and some will be on Arches watercolour paper. All will have gold or palladium, silver sometimes but that will be sealed. Gouache or watercolour depending on the image. I always use watercolour pencils first to do the base image.

A lot of people asked if my art was religious and that had me a bit freaked. Not particularly, but I'm drawn to Iconography and Art before the Renaissance, Byzantine and Gothic to be specific as well as Celtic. I also love Art Noveau and Art Deco works. I love tattoos and in another life probably would have been a tattoo artist.

I'm not discussing my spirituality or religious beliefs through art, that wasn't my focus and I struggled with that. I also didn't want to be seen disrespecting any religion as I am not a political artist either. So, feedback good or bad is welcome, I don't get offended easily as long as it's honest. Art is subjective.

Anyway, images and wip's and parts of my paper process journal will start appearing here again now that I have defined what I'm doing in my head. Once I have it more solidified I'll put it here. I'm redefining myself and moving away from web design, which while more lucrative doesn't call me as much as traditional art. I have one large corporate client site to finish then I can move over completely.

Probably why Zentangles appeals to me as a relaxation tool rather than the scrunched paper method for inspiration. I doodle all the time anyway but Zentangles are more structured.

I tend to perfectionism especially in my artwork. Lines and colours etc have to be right and some pieces have been ripped up and/or done multiple times before it's right enough for me. A lot of people express horror if an artist rips stuff up but a process journal can only hold so much LOL 

Life has been chaotic with all the comings and goings and people's perceptions of me. I am not a cookie cutter Mum. I connect with my kids with the exception of one. I don't know why, but I just don't meet what she thinks a Mother should be. And that makes me sad.

But, I am who I am and 3 think I'm a great Mum. It's taken a long time for me to accept that she'll always be looking for the perfect Mother ideal she holds. She got imperfect me who just doesn't behave the way she wants and I have to stop trying to be that fictional person.

I wrote this to focus myself  and make sure I don't forget the direction. I don't like a lot of chaos, some I can handle but the jumble of life and what other people want me to be or think was too much for me in the last couple of years. So, please excuse the rambling while I redefine and sort my life back out. Thinking about how I feel instead of what I'm expected to feel, say or do.

Anyway, I have to go put my Mummy cape on as D3 is having a friend drama!

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